she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
