You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Two words: blizzard sex
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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