i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
You dont lie about slip and slides
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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