so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize