I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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