He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
