how can u be prego again
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She said her name was "party"
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
