I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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