Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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