Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
We are two peas in an std pod
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
