You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
