He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
