Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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