ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
