Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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