I'll bet she douches with gravy.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
