whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
