all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
