He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize