toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
