fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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