I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize
