she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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