btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
