Sponge bath it is.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize