just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
