She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
