It's like God shit irony all over that family
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
