you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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