YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
