Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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