oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
