toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
