I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
