Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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