I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
