all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
