I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Don't tell me you're on acid again
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Randomize