thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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