How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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