So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
