Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I need to calm my uterus...
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize