Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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