My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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