her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
