I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize
