Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
