i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize