There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
