Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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