The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
