If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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