so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
